


Stay With Me

by Sphenimersus



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Bottom Dean, Bottom Sam (implied), M/M, Sad Dean, Top Dean (implied), Top Sam, Underage (implied), Unrequited Love, pre-Stanford era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-27
Updated: 2016-02-27
Packaged: 2018-05-23 11:39:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,902
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6115336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sphenimersus/pseuds/Sphenimersus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Angst. Just angst. Well, some porn too. But angsty porn.</p>
<p>**Sam is 17 in this fic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stay With Me

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by the title of two songs with the same title: "Stay With Me" by Taeyang and by Sam Smith
> 
> Okay, I want to apologize for writing this because:  
> 1\. Sam’s a bit of an asshole in this. Just a teensy bit though.  
> 2\. Everything in here is basically angst.  
> 3\. I made myself cry writing this, so if you cry, please don’t be mad at me.
> 
> Oh, for anyone that’s looking for top!dean or bottom!sam, please note that I will never explicitly write that. Also, in this fic, it is very lightly implied. It’s only mentioned once in passing and immediately moves on to bottom!dean and top!sam.  
> To be honest, this story was not intended to have sex in it, but my messed up mind decided, “Hey, you should write sex with lots of angst on Dean’s part.” And who am I to deny what my mind tells me to write.  
> So, yeah, angsty porn, here we go!
> 
> **Disclaimer:** I don’t own any of the characters of Supernatural.

“Sam, please,” Dean begs, holding his brother’s hands. “Don’t go.”

Shaking his head, Sam lets go of Dean, “I’m going, Dean. Dad told me to never come back if I walked out that door. I walked out, Dean. I’m not coming back. Even if he didn’t say that, I won’t come back.”

Dean cries, “Why? Did that night mean nothing to you?”

“It meant everything to me,” Sam replies with a mask of sadness. “But it’s not what I want. Let me go, Dean. I need to find my purpose in life. Hunting isn’t the life I want. Hunting is something Dad forced us into.”

Dean looks up at his younger brother, tears coming close, “What about saving people?” _What about me?_ He adds silently, hoping his brother will understand.

“I’m going to Stanford to become a lawyer. I can save people like that. I won’t need to see the blood that’s being shed. I can capture the criminals and save others from becoming their victim.” Sam answers, pointedly looking anywhere except his brother’s face. “I can’t live this life, Dean. I don’t want this life. I want to be able to choose what I do. I want to be free.”

“Don’t leave me, Sammy,” Dean pleas quietly. _I love you. You said you love me._ He shakes violently, knees buckling but still gripping tightly to Sam’s arm sleeve. “Please. _I need you_.”

Sam shakes his head, “No, you don’t need me, Dean. You need Dad.” He gently removes his elder brother’s hands, clasping them together. “You’ll live, Dean. You don’t need me.” He stands up and leaves for the bus heading to California. “Good-bye, big brother.”

Dean sits on the ground, staring at the hands Sam was holding just moments ago. He replies too late, whispering into the night, “I do need you, Sammy. I’ve needed you since you were born, Sammy. Why don’t you believe me, Sammy? Sammy, where are you? I need you.” He’s a sobbing mess when he adds quietly, “I love you.” Then he screams, broken cries of sorrow, “Sammy?! Sammy, Sam, Sam, Sa…” He’s wailing like a child. The people in the streets look at him pitifully - he doesn’t notice. The people coming from their motel rooms tell him to shut up - he doesn’t notice. His father brings him into their motel room - he doesn’t notice. All he knows is that Sam, Sammy, his little brother, his lover, the most important person to the world to him isn’t there. He falls asleep, dreaming of the night he found the Stanford acceptance letter Sam had.

* * *

Sam’s in the bus before he can hear Dean’s quiet reply. But he does hear the broken screams of his name. He knows that he broke Dean’s heart. He had no idea that Dean’s feelings ran that deep. It had never crossed his mind. They’d been having sex for the past year, and there had been no sign. Until two nights ago. Sam should have known that night. Should have refused. Sam, wanting to be rid of the guilt, falls asleep in the backseat of the bus.

* * *

Dean’s cleaning Sam’s clothes when he sees a crumpled paper at the bottom of their duffel. Dean chuckles, thinking that it’s a page of porn that Sam tore out from a copy of his Busty Asian Beauty magazine. He doesn’t mind since Sam’s still a boy to him. Just because Sam had asked him to fuck him for the past year doesn’t mean the boy isn’t aroused by girls too. Moreover, they agreed that they could date or make out with others, and that their “relationship” isn’t anything official. Just because Dean hasn’t been with another person in the time with Sam doesn’t mean Sam can’t do it.

Still, it makes Dean a bit jealous of the paper. He hums as he opens the paper, wondering which model Sam had taken a liking to. But as soon as he sees it, his eyes widen from the words on it. _It’s a college acceptance letter_ , he thinks. _Sam’s leaving?_ He checks the date, and there’s some small scribbles on it. ‘need to leave on sunday’ It’s Wednesday, so in a few days, Sam’s leaving. Dean starts breathing harshly, _No! Sammy wouldn’t leave me._

Dean checks the duffel for any other signs that Sam might leave. A few clothes are missing from Sam’s bag. Some bathroom essentials are too. _No! It’s just a coincidence._ He shoves the possibility to the very back of his mind, ignoring the nagging feeling that Sam _is_ going to leave.

Two days later, Dean hears Sam through the bathroom door, “Yes, thank you. I would like to accept the offer. I will be there soon to discuss the matter of where I will live in the dorms. Yes, thank you. Talk to you soon.”

The words hit Dean like a freight train, and it verifies that Sam is leaving for Stanford. _No, no, no, no, no._ With that, Dean resolves himself, masking his pain and walking out with only a towel against his waist. _I can be strong. I can keep smiling_. He smirks at his younger brother, striding straight to Sam, who’s on the computer doing who knows what. “Sam,” he purrs. “Dad’s not coming back until Sunday. He called while you were at the library.”

Sam looks up from his spot and flushes a beautiful shade of red. “Bed?” He asks.

Dean nods, smile plastered to his face, “Yeah. And I want you to top today.”

Gasping, Sam replies, “Really? Are you sure?”

“Yeah, c’mon,” the elder man struts to the bed, dropping the towel on the way. When he plops down on to the bed, he opens his legs invitingly and lowers his voice, “Sammy, I know you want it.”

Sam gulps. “O-okay. Let me get the lube.”

Dean says huskily, “Already got it.” He throws the bottle of lube to Sam.

Catching the bottle, Sam stutters, “U-umm, how do you want it?”

“Any way you like, baby boy,” Dean responds.

Sam nods dumbly and sits in between his older brother’s leg. _Okay… I’ll take it slow then._ Carefully slathering his fingers up with too much lube, he tentatively prods at the exposed hole.

Dean gasps at the simple touch, knowing that he’s sensitive in that part of his body. It’s the first time he has ever let anyone other than himself touch there. Squirming on the bed, he blindly reaches out for the hand that’s not poking at his anus. He entwines their fingers together, holding tightly. “Sa-sa-sammy,” he moans out, shoving his ass back while ignoring the growing sensation in his dick.

Growing confidence, Sam slips a finger into the perineum smoothly. Searching out for that spot that Dean always seems to find in him, Sam wiggles his finger until he hears Dean nearly scream at the pleasure from hitting his prostate. Not wanting to hurt his brother, Sam lathers more lube on the area where he is connected to his brother. After another moment, Sam tucks middle finger into the tight passage along with his index finger. He watches every contour in Dean’s face as it changes due to the immense pleasure. He wants to watch for hours, finding the reactions absolutely _fascinating_. Still prodding at the pleasure spot, he hears Dean wail in delight. He stops when he hears the words “st-stop” being muttered out by the elder boy. Moving to pull out, Sam stills when he sees the elder Winchester’s eyes _begging_ to not take out the fingers.

Finally, Dean rasps out, “Don’t take them out. I’m just about to come, just slow down.”

Nodding, Sam shifts back to position, this time putting in a third finger. He carefully watches Dean’s expressions, just the slightest bit of pain from the stretch only to be overtaken by pleasure in the next second.

Dean wriggles on the bed, whimpering and gasping out in pleasure. The only times he begs, _begs_ for Sam to stop, it’s to ensure that the occasion won’t end to early. Dean mindlessly pleads, “More, _please_ , _more_. Give me another, I can take it. _Please._ ’

“Fuck,” Sam helpfully responds. He slides in a fourth finger, stretching Dean’s rim just the right amount.

It’s too much and too little all at once. The sensations crash into Dean, causing him to writhe in pleasure. All of a sudden, the fingers in his ass disappears and Dean whines.

Sam whispers softly, “You’re getting something else Dean; you’ll be full in no time.” Just as he said, Sam moves so his cock is lined up with Dean’s hole. He lets his sex glide across the crack of Dean’s ass. Biting his bottom lip, he pushes into his brother suddenly, causing a shocked grunt to be pushed out from Dean's breath.

Tears threaten to fall as Dean desperately hugs his little brother whom he knows is going to leave. This'll be their last night. Their last night of together. He can hear his heart shattering as it beats rapidly to the intensity of the situation along with his undeniable, unconditional love he holds for his little brother. A feeling, an emotion, he knows that will never be returned. A single tear betrays him and quickly rolls down his flushed cheek. He latches onto Sam's body with his arms and buries his head in the crook of his neck. Biting down on the flesh, Dean growls to hide his wrecked-from-sadness voice, “ _More, faster,_ give it to me _baby brother_!”

Sam simply glances at Dean and complies, thrusting in and out with all the strength he could muster. “You want it, Dean? Hard, rough, _strong_? Someone to hold you _down_ and pound into your pretty little ass?” He punctuates each sentence with a harder thrust each time.

“ _Fuck_ ,” Dean curses and wails into Sam’s flesh. He wants to use his own hand to lead his climax to completion, but he refuses to let go of this final chance to touch the love of his life. He tries to beg, plead Sam to understand that he needs to be _touched_. His words come out in mumbles, mouth moving against Sam’s neck, “Please, please, please. _Sammy_.”

Somehow understanding the incoherent message, Sam reaches down between their bodies. His hand moves in time with the rhythm he's got with the back side of Dean.

Sam grunts before he finally spills his seed into Dean. He continues to lightly thrust in and out of Dean’s ass, attempting to slowly bring his brother to ecstasy.

Dean cries out as his climax abruptly arrives. It's too much. The sensation is burning him. The cock in his ass, the hand encompassing his own dick, the light, peppered kisses Sam somehow manages to place on him. His eyes burn with the flash of pleasure that fully envelops his entire being. But behind all that physical pleasure, his heart burns in sorrow. He finally has something that he wants, but he needs to let it go in two days time. He whispers to half to himself and half to Sam, “Stay with me.” He wants his love to stay with him. He wants this love of his to live on with him. He wants this pleasure to stay with him forever. But he still knows that it will never happen. That this is the end of their story. This night is “The End” for the relationship between the brothers.

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't think of a proper ending for this, so it kinda sucks. Sorry about that.
> 
> Thanks for reading! <3
> 
> P.S. Don't beat me up for this. *runs far, far away*


End file.
